As a travel writer, I’ve written my fair share of listicles, such as “20 Things To See and Do in [insert popular city or country]” based on a press trip or an assigned comprehensive research. I, too, like reading travel lists by other writers before exploring a new place.

But should you aim to see every famous landmark and tourist spot when traveling? I learned the hard way that not only is it near-impossible to see every single one, but it also becomes a stressful scavenger hunt that gives you the complete opposite of a vacation. And even if you do end up ticking off every item, you’ll realize that many are overcrowded, overhyped, and underwhelming in person. Some call it “tourist trap fatigue,” when you get burned out from spending all your time at tourist-heavy locations that limit your exposure to authentic local culture.

I remember a trip to Korea, where my family’s travel agency pre-arranged our one-week trip. Our daily itinerary was tightly packed with things to see and do, and we could only linger for 20-40 minutes in each spot. You take a few photos and go on a quick bathroom break before rushing back to the tour bus on time, lest we get dirty looks from the other tourists in the bus.

Sure, our Facebook album was packed with photos from the checklist, but we hardly had time to immerse ourselves in the culture and take it all in. I told myself: Never again to tightly scheduled tours for several days straight.

Discovering My Travel style

“What’s your travel style?” That’s the first thing I ask back whenever friends and loved ones come to me for travel advice. Some are stumped because they have no idea what their personal travel style is. They’re just used to following someone else’s lead.

Before giving people curated travel tips, I enumerate the travel styles via these questions to get a feel of what they’re inclined to do:

• Are you a luxury traveler who prefers 5-star hotels, chauffeured private tours, and fancy restaurants?
• Are you a foodie with a big list of must-eats, Michelin-starred restaurants, and popular holes-in-the-wall?
• Are you an adventurer who loves hikes, nature, and the off-the-beaten-path?
• Do you like the immersive backpacker or flashpacker style?
• Are you traveling with kids and/or seniors?
• Are you a culture vulture who loves to spend hours in museums and art galleries?
• Are you the checklist traveler who wants to see as many of the sights and landmarks as possible within a short amount of time?

The latter is the one I loathe the most, because that’s how I begrudgingly started and what I thought travel was supposed to be like. These days, I’m a mix of adventurer and flashpacker, sprinkled some savviness of a business traveler, thanks to years of trial and error.

As children, our parents are usually the first to introduce us to travel, and we have no choice but to mirror their style. As we get older, we’re exposed to other travel styles through friends, relatives, relationships, and colleagues. It wasn’t until I started traveling alone in my late ’20s and up until my late ’30s that I figured out what my travel preference is. Many people, sadly, don’t ever figure it out.

One of the best things about discovering your travel style is that you no longer have to waste your time exploring every single landmark or booking every popular organized tour. You can choose which spots you’d really like to see up-close based on your travel style and personal interest (i.e. what the cultural backstory means to you). Then decide which ones you’d rather skip.

Some spots will hold great meaning or interest for you, while others will elicit zero feelings, and that’s okay. To each their own. You are also allowed to evolve and update your travel preferences as you grow older.

Whenever I come home from my travels and converse with people who have been to the same places, they often barrage me with, “Did you go to [insert name of popular tourist spot]? You should’ve gone to this and that! Why didn’t you take a picture with [insert famous edifice]?” Initially, it left me feeling confused. Should I feel bad that I didn’t go to every single one of those places? Is it wrong to skip popular spots? Does that mean I’m not an adept traveler?

It took me a while to realize that the answer is no. No, you’re not better than other travelers just because you’ve been to more places. No, I’m not an inept traveler if I spend my time and money on unusual itineraries that other people wouldn’t understand. No, you don’t have to travel exactly like your family, friends, or popular travel influencers. No, traveling with family and friends doesn’t mean you should be together every waking moment of the trip. No, you don’t have to see every single landmark.

When did travel become a competition, a contest for seeing the most places in the least amount of time? Travel is about discovering your own style, finding fulfillment through your own unique itinerary, and being open to unplanned adventures.

Refining the Checklist

I remember getting a ticket to the hop-on, hop-off double-decker sightseeing bus in Taipei. It took us around the city’s famous landmarks, with the option to go down and explore each of those 15 famous spots up close. I chose to go down to see only two spots. As for the rest, I was satisfied to view them from my bus seat.

When I was in Hanoi, I was tempted to book a day tour that included the famous incense village that influencers were gloating about. Thank goodness TikTok took me to the “Social Media vs. Reality” algorithm that showed me what the incense village really looks like without the cropped and highly saturated photos. Turns out it’s not a village, natural hill, or even a flourishing garden—just a bunch of bundled incense sticks carefully laid out on the ground of the store’s backyard. That saved me the money and half a day gone to waste.

Another “Social Media vs. Reality” tourist spot I almost fell for was Bali’s Pura Lempuyang Luhur, a temple site popularly known as the Gates of Heaven and a notorious hot spot for influencers. Turns out the curated photos you see on social media is fake. There is no reflective lake under the temple, as seen in many influencers’ photos. The illusion is created by a local who sits under an umbrella and holds a mirror underneath your iPhone, making it look like there’s a pristine lake under the temple’s monoliths. This was back in 2017, before the dawn of TikTok. I learned about the Gates of Heaven photo trick from a local guide I met through Couchsurfing Ubud. She saved me from booking a tour there.

Travel Competition

When I was in Kaohsiung, I contemplated booking the classic day tour that takes you to the top sights, including Pier 2. I’m glad I decided to skip the tour as most of the spots didn’t really interest me. I decided to explore Pier 2 on my own in a slower pace. I would have hated being rushed.

My fellow Pinoy creators also kept telling me about Kaohsiung’s Dome of Light. Thank goodness I unintentionally ran into the said dome one night. I realized that a.) It’s not as jaw-dropping as I expected it to be (only when you take a wide shot from a lower angle), and b.) You will pass by the dome each time you enter/exit the Formosa Boulevard MRT Station, so there’s no need to orchestrate an entire morning or afternoon for it.

In Da Nang, people kept telling me to go to the Dragon Bridge. If you’d like to admire the architecture of the bridge up close while listening to the stories of a local guide, then by all means go for the Da Nang Day Tour! But for me, passing the Dragon Bridge and seeing it from a distance was enough.

When I squeezed in a last-minute DIY trip to see the pagodas at Lotus Lake before flying out of Kaohsiung, I realized I should have spent those precious last hours somewhere else. Don’t get me wrong; I appreciate the cultural significance of this artificial lake. I just would have rather spent those hours somewhere else.

Day Trip: Yay or Nay?

While I avoid tightly organized trips where each day and hour is packed with a tour-guide-led itinerary, I will not discount day tours or half-day tours altogether. I’ve had many memorable day tours in the past, and you’ll see me recommend them in this blog.

For example, when had only three days left in Florence, my Italy-based cousin told me it was impossible to DIY a trip to Pisa and Siena in a short amount of time. She helped me pick a day tour that took me to Pisa, Siena, and San Gimignano all in one day. I liked every single activity and location on the list, so it was worth it.

Before you book a day tour full of landmarks and attractions, here’s a little guide:

1. Study the map of the city you’re staying in. If your hotel is within walking distance to most of the attractions you want to see, then there’s no need to book a day tour. You will organically run into those spots as you walk around the neighborhood.

2. Browse the list of attractions offered by the day tour. If more than half the spots don’t interest you, then it’s a waste of time and money. I only book a day tour if I like at least 70% of the spots and activities on the list.

3. Do you have time and money to DIY the places you really want to see, given their distance from each other? Sometimes it’s more practical to book a guided day tour or half-day tour.

4. Are you okay to spend a limited amount of time in each spot? Day tours are notorious for giving you only about 20-40 minutes of free time per stop. There’s hardly any time to shop or leisurely explore.

What If Your Travel Style and List Don’t Match the Majority?

Travel is the true litmus test for friends, family, and relationships. Unfortunately, my travel style does not mesh well with most of my friends and family, which is why I prefer traveling alone.

For trips that I have to take with friends and family, I always ask for “me days”—solo days or just a few hours a day where I can go off to do my own thing (and so should they), and just reconnect with everyone else back at the hotel or for dinner. It’s better than hearing passive-aggressive grievances while I’m happily exploring something that only I want to do, nor do I want to be dragged into something that’s a waste of my time. I’m able to do more during “me days.”

As for the quest to see every single landmark, consider this: If your fulfillment relies on the number of items you need to tick off the list and photos you need to show off to your friends, then perhaps it’s time to rethink why you travel. I should know. I used to be that girl.